Hi Missy, I consider myself a free spirt too.  Even in times of trial I never gave up.  Its seems my bright illusion of life is growing smaller each and everyday.  I want to call it quits but this website encouages me to hang in there.  I feel there is hope and openning up and expressing myself is a process.  How much can we actually understand about our development when we are constantly growing to learning new ways.  I want to travel around to these gatherings and drift around forever.  I don't see myself growing a garden and living off the land or this maybe the result of this process that I see so many rainbow family members doing.