If being completely in the present is hard for you... or if the whole concept escapes you this is for you....

At 10 years old I was a vicious child... clever, intelligent, perceptive, and a much higher achiever than my peer group... I was taught that I was Superior... these intelectal gift had been honed into a ruthless weapon used against anyone and everyone .... I was argumentative and psychologically abusive to anybody that tried to exercise control or any kind of authority over me.... but this left me friendless and alone much of the time... I was very unhappy....

How does one become a better person? how does one become happy? how does one become enlightened ? is this a natural process ?
Well Yes and no, there are two types of evolution... first type.. is unconscious Evolution occurs in nature slowly over Generations creatures.. the species changes slowly as part of the natural process experienced in this existence however it is not this type of evolution that leads to happiness or enlightenment or even just being a better person so let's talk about the second type..
The second type of evolution is conscious evolution occurs by seeing a mistake made in the past and changing and evolving as to not make the mistake again.
.. this helps to hurry the process up.. but despite all the knowledge that has been a mass throughout the ages people prefer to learn from their own mistakes from their own limited experiences.. so of course people's responses to most life choices remain as primitive as peoples of thousands of years ago... can man change? if he has no memory of things that precede him.. his memories are only of his childhood and was chosen to learn.. yet it is memory that conditions and shapes responses to life and determines patterns of growth... what is not memory alone that allows us to grow as people... memory is important... just as planning is important... but we cannot forget about the present... these are all important part of the process... and each lead to respective steps and goals... the entire process is necessary.. it's not just a process it's a journey and like any Journey it's not just about arriving...if your destination or the steps you're going to take in the future take up so much of your time and attention then you will miss the lessons that you could be being taught in the present...

In the summer of my 10th year my aunt took me to the beach... she turn me loose and told me to go have fun or something while she ran off to play with her new boyfriend in the waves I was left on the beach just sit... this is the first time I ever saw Surfers in person... my first impression of these people was that they were "a bunch of happy dumb idiots".... but as I observed them I could not help but be envious of them... when they were riding the waves they seem to have a sixth sense that somehow allowed them to not crash into each other as somehow they were aware of each other at all times... and when they came in to shore... everyone flocked around them... they were incredibly popular people... and everybody seemed to want to be their friend.... the memories of this one afternoon what about the shape the path of my life forever.... I wanted to become one of those "happy dumb idiots"...

When you're on a journey, it is certainly helpful to know where are you are going or at least a general direction you're moving in... the same is true with life... because life is a journey that has a destination... the outer destination to be sure but a destination none the less.... the Journey of life isn't to discover Who You Are... it is to create who you will be... it is totally the concern of the waking mind.... your outer Journey maybe a million steps but its focus is on arriving at your goal or outer destination. To accomplish this or that, to achieve what it is that you set out to do.. these things of course imply the future... but I wanted to be happy... I did not realize this but this had nothing to do with the outer destination..
Because since a young age most people have had this part of their mind rolled into sleep by the routine orientation of life... the day-to-day duties School, chores, jobs, meal times, bad times, and wake up times to prepare to do it all again.... these practices all used time-based. Or the waking mind... whereas we break up our lives into a series of little blocks of time... our entire Society is based off of this... and only with the waking mind can you succeed in mundane life... this is such a common practice fourth grade almost every child is uniformly living only in the waking mind... and this unbalanced practice is what... lulls the sleeping mind into sleep... so doing this causes the principles of life to become unbalanced and leads to boredom, depression, and general discontent with life.
When I was 10 years old I was exactly the same... my upbringing was different from most... I too had my sleeping mind lulled into the sleeping.... it was the rigid and ambitious striving to be better, be competitive, and argumentative with my fellow man..... I didn't realize it but I was about to change the outward Journey Of My Life... and in doing so I was going to end up discovering and taking the first steps on my inward Journey of seeking the Edge..

So I change the clothes I wore.... let my hair grow... and did chores for a solid month at my Aunt's house to save the money to get a cheap used surfboard...
So I take my surfboard and I swim out past the breakers were the surf folk would sit waiting for "their set" and I sit out there and talked with the surfers for a while... being so young.. and quiet... most of them took to me immediately.
.. the first time that I decided to try to ride a wave in... I fell... and being that I didn't have my dog leash fasten the right way or knew how to swim through a moving wave...I got sucked into a Riptide...

In life-threatening emergency situations, The shift in Consciousness from time-based Thought ( The waking mind) To present based thought (the sleeping mind) happens naturally.... the part of your mind that has a past it remembers or future if plans for, recedes from control momentarily and is replaced by an intense conscious presence in the moment... very still but very alert at the same time... this is the sleeping mind... The outer purpose belongs to the horizontal dimension of space and time... it has to do with who and where you want to be in this world and in the future... it is completely a construct of the waking mind.
...the inner destination concerns the rousing of the sleeping mind.... deepening of your being in the vertical dimension of Timeless now... your outer Journey May consist of a million steps your inner Journey only has one step you're taking now.. as you become more deeply aware of this step... you realize that it already contains within itself all the other stuff as well as the destination.
. with your sleeping mind roused and on the step of the inner purpose you find that you're living completely in the present... living in the present creates that intensely alive state that is free of Time, free of problems, free of mundane.

I got sucked down so deep in the water I was so disoriented my lungs hurt and burned and I did not know which way was up or shore and my final thought as the cold darkness of the ocean crept in was that if my life was over at least I had a couple hours of happiness... couple hours where I actually belong and was accepted... I made peace with my death.. and as the darkness took me for the fist time in my life I felt truly at peace and happy...
Now lucky for me one of the surfers saw me go down... realize what was happening and dove into save me... I woke up on the beach coughing salt water out of my lungs while smiling idiot I had just met day kneeled over the top of me... he had open and save my life even though he barely knew me... when I asked him why he did it... he told me "we are all Brothers... all connected by one ocean... each of us with the salt that is in that ocean flowing within our own blood.... I could not just let you drowned man" this experience changed me for ever...

Now I understood my outer journey I wanted to be like one of these guys....but I was now...I was a salt brother...I was one of those "happy dumb idiots" but I was not really...just because they saw me this way did not change the way I felt inside.... it was because I didn't understand the inward Journey's destination... I was missing the whole point... it didn't have to do with where I was going or what I was doing... it actually had to do with how I was doing it.... it didn't have to do with becoming something in the future... it had to do with being conscious in that moment... But of course I misunderstood this... think of sitting in a high spot... on the edge of a bridge, are the tip of a cliff... sitting there with your legs dangling over in the open air... this high place with a Chance of falling is a great place of magic it helps you do something wonderful.. this is an edge..Edge's help you to wake the sleeping mind...I thought it was the dangerous situation That unlock this for me... It was the living on the edge...
drugs for instance peticularly the usage of psychedelics like peyote or mushrooms.. have the ability to the help us to evolve and train the sleeping mind... these are also a type of an edge... though not a physical one... this type of edges are less physically dangerous... you have a lot less of a chance: plummeting to your death, or drowning... but this is not to say that they don't have risks.. these substances like all edges need to be handled with respect, reverence, awareness..... they are not things that should just be done simply for recreational use...
The reason why some people of dangerous activities... Such as extreme sports... Mountain climbing.. Parachuting... hang gliding...surfing... so they may not be aware of it, it is because these things forced them to living in the moment... they are forced to an edge... forces them to rouse their sleeping mind... they have to live completely in the moment because if they lose track for even one second it will be the death of them... trust me you cannot Skydive skateboard and free climb to this mindset permanently... you're more likely to die searching for your next big fix... it would be years before I properly understood this lesson..
while edges help us to learn how to arouse,train ,and even evolve the sleeping mind.... like any kind of medicine that helps you... if over-indulged in for the wrong reasons it can become as dangerous as any mind altering experience....each time one comes to an edge in life it should be approached cautiously... and afterwards the whole experience should be meditated,contemplated and refected about... but we'll get more into that later

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